Today at church the speaker (which happened to be my cross country coach), spoke about everyone being the church, black, white or yellow. He said that we are not home yet, and that’s the reason we may never feel like we belong, the reason that we get so homesick, is because we are not home yet. We long for a home that we have never been to.
God offers some encouragement at this thought,
I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you- John 14:18
I’ve never quite felt like I belong, I always feel out of place, like I don’t really know how to interact with others in the way they interact with each other. Those feelings, I now know come from the longing desire to be home, in heaven, with my Father. Now, God will lead us to where we will feel like we belong, He will not leave us in places that we don’t feel like we belong, and if He does, its because He has plans for us. For the past four years, I’ve been at school, and I have never once felt like I belong or that I fit in. I still feel like I don’t fit in, and God has kind of given me the knowledge that its because, I’m not quite where He wants me to be.
I have a traveling heart, I want to go around the world, and see everything, see the beauty of the world, I want to move to the mountains. I know part of me really wants to get out of Florida, but, the other parts of me know…that God is going to move my future husband and I. God knows we don’t always feel like we fit in, and its a good thing because often, the ones who don’t feel like they belong, are the ones whose purposes are bigger than they know. Just when we feel like we want to give up, like God is not going to answer our prayer, He sends us the words “Wait, on my perfect timing.” Chances are, there are things we need to learn before He brings us to the place where we will feel like we belong. Its easy, when you have a traveling heart, to look at friends who have moved, pictures of kids from Africa, and people who are having adventures around the world and think…. “I’m stuck here while everyone else is doing amazing things and seeing great things, and fit in where they are!”
When we think that, we have to combat it with, the fact that God is going to bring us to where we are supposed to be at just the right time. I can try and try, to fit in and say the right things, and do the things that people think are cool, but they will never be truly a part of who I am. My best bet, is to be myself, wait on God to take me where I am supposed to be, and see the fruit, of patiently waiting on Christ. I feel overwhelmed when I feel like I am stuck and I am never going to get anywhere, but when I think those things I have to repent because, its me thinking of myself, instead of God and His will for us. God is so great, He knows exactly what we are going to do, when we are going to do them, He knows what He has in store for us, when those things will happen and who will be brought into and taken out of our lives.
In moments when I get overwhelmed with feeling like everyone around me is doing more great things and seeing great things, that the people around me fit in and have friends, I have to pray, and ask God to encourage me and show me, just one glimpse of what he has in store for me. Its okay to ask God to speak to you about what He has in store for you, pray diligently and specifically like what I talked about last time. God knows that we are restless, He knows we have traveling hearts, He knows that we don’t feel like we belong. He knows…… what our purpose is, He knows what will bring us joy, He knows we will feel more amazing and have more amazing days, once He takes us to where He wants us. He wants to see us dance in joy, sing praises in awe and wonder of the God, who is leading us to glory.
Do you ever wonder about what Joseph felt through His life? Joseph was hated by his brothers, he was sold as a slave, he described dreams to a pharaoh, and finally, because God blessed him, and he had finally come to where God wanted him, he felt like he belonged. Joseph flourished and brought his family to where he was, Joseph knew the most what it felt like to not belong. The Israelites, for 40 years wandered in the desert place, and didn’t feel like they belonged anywhere, but when God finally brought them to the place that He wanted them, they were able to start a life that helped them find their place. Another example, as a nerd I quite enjoy the Hobbit movies, and the dwarves never know what ‘home’ is, they don’t know what it is to belong anywhere, but Bilbo does. He knows what it is to belong, and at the very end of the movies, and the book, everyone is back where they belong. They have a tough journey, and they feel like giving up, but… just when they finally make it, they know they have a home in the end.
If you’re a traveling heart, and you find that you don’t know where you fit in, pray to God, ask Him to give you a glimpse of what He has ins tore for you, ask Him to wreck your heart and help you see what He wants you to learn. After you pray, turn to the word of God, and listen carefully to what He is saying to you, chances are you’re on the brink of something new. Trust in God, and let Him be in control of your life. Learn to be content with what you have, where you are, and not knowing where God is leading you. Then, write down what you want in the next five years, I’m not talking about life stuff, I’m talking about spiritual stuff. Write down where you want to go, even if you don’t know specifics, even if its just, “I want to be somewhere other than Florida” or Colorado, or London. Just write it down, and keep the paper where you can see it. And after a year, look at where God has moved you and what you wrote on that paper.