All the embarrassing places

2014-03-19 14.12.01

                                    This post is kind of hard for me to write… its a subject that I battle with every single day… and I know I’m not alone, I know there are many other women who struggle with it too but, its not any easier to talk about. I am 22, I have long legs, a short torso and I am an athlete. Despite being really into sports and exercise, I still struggle with my weight, I’ve started to eat healthier and I run a lot. The one thing I never think about is the way I am built. I am a curvy girl, and for being short that means I have to be extra careful about the way I eat and work out. I have this thing where I can go for a while with eating healthy and working out every day and then there is a week in between, sometimes even two or three weeks where, I just eat awful. After I eat those satisfying greasy foods, I beat myself up for days after! With getting married in two months its getting worse because I want to be in the best shape I can be in and I don’t want to gain any weight.

                              When I was a senior in high school,  weighed the most I have ever weighed in my whole life, I was 159 lbs, and while that may not sound like much to you, for a short, young, girl that was not great to hear. The doctor told me that I was at a point where I almost was considered overweight. When I got into college, I started running and working out, and eating healthy. I lost about 20 lbs! I am so happy and I feel so much better but, because I saw myself so long as a “fat” girl, I have a fear of gaining weight, and I almost never see any progress in my body. I always feel bigger even though I haven’t gained any weight.

                           For many women, this is a struggle, and it constantly makes us tear ourselves down, I know that I always beat myself up after eating things like cookies, pizza, or even just eating a lot of small things. In scripture God tells us to take care of our bodies, but He doesn’t tell us to obsess over them or let them make us feel awful about ourselves. Everyone has days where they eat really well and then other days where they don’t want so well. My problem is when I eat a lot, I work out really hard and beat myself up even though I have had a good eating week. God doesn’t want us to be sad about the way we look. He has created us beautifully and good. It doesn’t matter what others say about us, especially if they are not our significant other or God.

                  For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do. -Ephesians 2:10

                    Song of Solomon has so many descriptions about how God views His church, to Him we are beautiful treasures, beautiful beyond the earth. God created each of us differently, saying “I am ugly” is like telling God that He  didn’t do a good job. Now, as an artist if someone told me that they hated one of my paintings of course I would be upset because I worked hard on that painting. Everything a painter does is intentional, the colors and strokes of the brush are all decided carefully. That is how God works with His creations, so why are we telling God that His creations, His works of art, are not good enough?

                         Ladies, as long as you’re eating right, exercising regularly, and are in the word daily you will be fine! God loves you and desires you, and if you’re married you’re husband sees yours the most beautiful woman in the world and you can’t keep telling him otherwise. Men get frustrated when you complain about hating the way you look because to them you are perfect! That is what love is, love doesn’t see your imperfections as bad things, they recognize you’re not perfect but see past it. You are so beautiful to them, they don’t see that extra fat, they see your perfect skin, or your perfect smile.

                 We need to start accepting the way we look and loving the way we look, I will always be curvy and even when I finally get rid of this stubborn fat, I will not be stick thin. I am trying to be okay with that.

Beauty is as relative as light and dark. Thus, there exists no beautiful woman, none at all, because you are never certain that a still far more beautiful woman will not appear and completely shame the supposed beauty of the first. -Paul Klee

                     If you ever want some help in prayer or about how to start eating healthy or just some encouragement, please let me know!

 You are all beautiful!

Much love,


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