When I was Younger


                  There was another release of a new dvd player in the newspaper, I threw it in the trash. Im only twenty but I feel like everything has changed since I was younger, every year there is a new iphone. Sarah was next to me, “Whats your problem?” she asked, “Its so stupid how much things have changed since we were younger. Im getting to that point where there is technology I have no idea how to use.” I complained. Sarah laughed, “Thats what happens when you get older”.

        I knew that but part of me hoped that things would slow down or rewind, new buildings were being built and the older ones were being left as they were. Everywhere I looked there were people staring at their phones, playing the newest app on their trendy iphones. There was new technological advancements taking place every day and I didn’t know how to use all of them. it made me feel like I was in my sixties.

            I sighed and picked up my coffee, “You know, you’re still kind of trendy too. You like Starbucks and you wear skinny jeans and crop tops. Granted your belly is still covered but you are kind of with the times.” she pointed out. “Ugh, whatever. i just wish things would slow down a little. I miss all the good 90’s shows and the music. Things seemed so much easier and fee then, now I feel like everything is all about looks and what you have.”  “Tracey, you have to stop obsessing over what that girl said about you.” Sarah ordered.

       The problem was, I couldn’t stop thinking about it, anytime I feel embarrassed or bad I think about those moments for years after. Thats what happens when you have social anxiety, it just takes over your mind. I looked out the window of Starbucks, the city was almost unrecognizable. “Anyway, we need to get going, Bryce is going to be upset if we are late again.” I murmured. “You’re right, lets go. I just think you need to remember that you’re beautiful and talented. You are so much more than what anyone thinks about you.” Sarah explained.

             I smiled, “Thanks” even though I didn’t really mean it. My mind was my worst enemy.

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